A lot of clients who try to book pro-submissive sessions aren’t successful. I’m very picky with who I sub to, and I believe I have every reason to be.
My submission is a gift; having me on knees in front of you, waiting to do what you ask of me. And this gift has to be earned. Before I let you tie me, spank me or tease me you need to show me not just your dominant side, but your sweet, caring side as well. You need to show me you will listen to me. You need to show me that you understand the complexities of D/S relationships.
When I find a dominant who shows me all of the above, it truly excites me. I love letting out my submissive side; handing over all responsibility to my Dom/me and trusting them to care for me. I love being restrained, overstimulated, and pushed to my limits by an experienced master before being allowed to collapse into them, praise ringing in my ears. Being able to hand over responsibility is a very liberating experience, when done with the right person. I believe all dom/mes should try subbing at least once, just to understand what it’s like to hand all control over to someone else and put your trust in them.
Unfortunately, it seems a lot of clients who want to see me for a pro-submissive sessions don’t understand proper BDSM and the role the dominant takes in it. The running joke in the kink scene is that the submissive is actually in control of all play, because when they safe word it stops. The dominant is there to guide their submissive, help them explore their boundaries, and help them to be a better person. Your role as the dominant is NOT to beat your sub black & blue or push them beyond their limits; you shouldn’t strike your sub out of anger or hate.
And never treat aftercare as an after-thought. A lot of fetishists who book me, submissive or dominant, aren’t aware of the importance of aftercare; instead purely focusing on the play. I like to discuss what aftercare is preferred at the start of the booking, as what is required differs from person to person and from scene to scene. Aftercare is important for letting the submissive know that they are still loved and wanted; it’s for taking care of any injuries that happened in-scene and is a way to provide comfort and support to both parties who engaged in the scene.
So before you book a pro-submissive session, please have a long, hard think about what aspects of domming appeal to you and why. I need to feel safe, secure and respected before I can even think of subbing for you - show me that you’re capable of treating me like a queen and I’ll let you treat me like your naughty girl.